Motherhood

(This comes a few days early, because I will be away on silent retreat on Mother's Day.)

I love Mother's Day.

This is a time in my life when many of my friends and my own generation of my family are becoming mothers. My family members are a bit older than me, but many of my friends are just my age, or a few years older, and many are married with children.

Somehow, this didn't hit me last year, probably because I was a student and not thinking about my life very far beyond graduation or JVC. But I look at myself and the way I live my life, and then I think about my girlfriends who have children, I realize how dramatically having a baby changes your life. Most of my daily concerns (often high-maintenance, superfluous concerns that don't mean anything at the end of the day) would never crop up in my mind if I were a mother. Or if they did, they would be quickly shooed away by something that my baby needs!

The other thought that occurred to me, especially as a family member is struggling through a difficult pregnancy (though mom and baby are both still well, thank God!), is how much my own mom went through when she carried me and my brother. Now that I'm actually experiencing the worry and concern that my parents and family went through when Mom's first pregnancy went awry, I am only just now grasping how terrified everyone must have been. More than anyone else's, my mother's anxiety must have been absolutely agonizing. (I am all the more thankful that she did everything she could, especially petitioning our Blessed Mother incessantly, to make sure we were OK, because all disasters were averted and Joe and I are fine!)

Which leads me to realize how much mothers give! If the acts of carrying and delivering a child aren't enough, the acts of parenting, protecting, forming, molding, teaching, nurturing, disciplining, feeding, bathing, educating, rocking, comforting, clothing, nursing, playing with, arguing with, dealing with tantrums of, checking homework for, cooking for, singing lullabies to, attending all recitals and ballgames and pageants and parent-teacher conferences of a child certainly are! Many in the world at large seem to disagree, but I can't think of anyone more important in a person's life than a mother.


I am also coming to see what happens when a mother does not step up to raise her children the way I have just described, especially as I've worked with Camden's youth and disadvantaged adults. So many of the children in my ministry have home lives that are in absolute shambles, and the adults in my ministry wouldn't have half of the problems they have now if their parents had given them the love and care they deserved when they were young. I remain convinced that if the families in this area were to concentrate all of their energy on setting positive examples for their children and doing everything in their power to love and discipline them, this city would be well on its way to complete renewal in ten years. As it is now, this city stands on the brink of hell, which is most apparent in how broken its families are.


So this is my salute to all of the amazing mothers in my life: Athena, Lindsey, Lauren, Meli, Heather, Courtney, Katie, Jessica, Aunt Maryl, Aunt Julie, Aunt Paula, Aunt Steph, Aunt Debbie (my godmother!), Laurie... and all the amazing moms I've missed. I hope God blesses you immensely on this Mother's Day!


But most especially, this is my salute to my mother. She's the best mom a girl could ask for. If I become even half the mother that she is to me, I will consider myself most blessed.

I love you, Mom.

I wanna be a part of it-- NEW YORK!!

Picture this: you arrive in New York City after a two-hour Megabus ride on a beautiful morning. You're a little dehydrated, a little hungry, and a little disoriented ("Excuse me, which way is 5th Avenue?").

Your options are: Door #1: Duck into the nearest Starbucks and ask the locals for directions.

Door #2: Grab a soda and a hot dog from the nearest vendor and sit down to fuel up before navigating the Big Apple.

Or, Door #3: Hoof it 22 blocks to Saint Patrick's Cathedral and end up drinking a Pepsi in the Archbishop of New York's rectory.

Ladies and gentlemen, the answer is, Door #3! What a way to spend Saturday morning!

Here's the full story: Father Qui-Thac Nguyen (the chaplain at my old Newman Center, and a really awesome friend and spiritual father to all of his students, both currently-studying students and alumni!) found himself in Washington DC last week and this week for vacation. Since we were on the same coast for the first time since Christmas (and even then, he and I were both so busy that we could only visit for about an hour), he gave me a call and asked if I wanted to meet him in NYC for lunch on Saturday. Knowing of my stipend-based poverty, he very generously got me a bus ticket to head north for the day! So on Saturday morning I got up early, took the subway into Philadelphia and hopped on a Megabus headed north.

Once I arrived, Father called me to say that he was at Saint Patrick's Cathedral. I figured it couldn't be too hard to find (I was standing at 28th St. and 7th Ave). I called my brother, who had been in New York more recently than me (and who visited the Cathedral about three times) to ask where the church was. He told me to go to 5th Avenue and start walking-- the church was "somewhere in the 30's". So I walked. All the way through the 30's, and I passed nothing that resembled a cathedral. So I asked a police officer where it was. He answered, "50th St." I muttered a quick "Holy Mother" before thanking him, and then I kept walking. Fast.

When I finally arrived at Saint Patrick's (God bless Father for waiting so patiently!), I called him to tell him I was out front. He told to go to the back, where the rectory is (which meant over another street-- this church is HUGE). I still wasn't sure where to go until I looked up and saw Padre in the window! I was so glad to see him!


Father had run into the Archbishop at a funeral service that morning, and His Excellency offered him a ride back to the city and a place to chill out until I got there. When I did arrive, Father said, "The bishop said you could have a Pepsi."

The Archbishop of New York! One of the most important Catholic leaders in this nation! And I got to drink a Pepsi in his parlor! We made sure to leave a thank-you note!

Once I'd cooled my heels and chatted with Father for a while, we decided to hit the city. The first place we went was right back into St. Patrick's so that Father could pray the day's Liturgy of the Hours. I decided to pray my rosary for the day while he did so.

I have to say, kneeling at the altar in Saint Patrick's, next to my favorite priest and before the tabernacle of the Lord, and praying was my favorite part of the whole trip. It's amazing-- no matter how far away from home you are, even in a city you've never been in before, visiting Jesus in the tabernacle (especially with your spiritual father at your side) always reminds us of where home truly is. I haven't felt that warm and safe in a long time.


Father, ever true to himself, was so generous all day! We picked up lunch from a deli and ate it in the middle of Times Square. We walked around a lot, and eventually headed to the top of the Empire State Building to take in the whole city at once. (The Statue of Liberty looks tiny from up there!) Afterwards we did head to a Starbucks to just hang out and chat before heading back to the Megabus stop. He had to head back to DC, and I went back to Camden. (New York is a LOT cheaper if you make a day trip there!)


I feel like this blog isn't doing the day justice-- I was just so overjoyed to be there, hanging out with Padre. He is such blessing to his students, and he goes to amazing lengths to shepherd us and remind us that we are loved, even after we've graduated. Anyone who knows Father QTN would not at all be surprised to hear that he bussed one of his old peer ministers up the East Coast just to hang out, which points to his amazing generosity and kind heart. But that doesn't diminish the fact that it was wonderfully generous of him, and that I am so thankful!

Right, so... this is what happened in January...

I really should update y’all on my life this month—I just can’t think of anything significant enough that it would be interesting to read that can also be posted on a public blog… some private stuff, etc. You know how it is.

Ok. Umm… I returned to work on January 4th after a nice (albeit short!) week at home with family and friends. Among my favorite days were a shopping trip in Seattle with my mom and sister, a gorgeous performance of The Nutcracker with said mom and sister (AND I ran into my old music teacher, who was there with his daughter!), a surprise visit to Bremerton to visit Andrew, Lindsey, and the babe (whose laugh is so intoxicating that I physically can’t keep from giggling when I hear it), a New Year’s Eve party (where I found many old friends and caught up with them… Neil, Jacob, Casey, Matt, Nicole, Lilly… I miss all of you!) and several quiet, one-on-one days with a few dear friends.

Work has been pretty stressful since I’ve been back. One of my cases was supposed to be resolved the Wednesday before last, and I was excited because it was the culmination of three months of hard work on my part. The client desperately needed a doctor’s appointment that she was finally going to have that afternoon. I stood with her and waited for her medical transportation to arrive. And we waited. And waited. And then… we waited some more. Long story short, it turned out that her medical transportation request was never sent. I was unbelievably frustrated—the rest of this woman’s life hinged upon this doctor’s appointment, and something as trivial as a clerical error kept it from happening. We were back at square one, and she’s been declining since I got her case in October.

The rest of the week didn’t seem to get better, and I found myself looking forward to Friday, which was the day I was going to take the GRE. (How stressed out do you have to be to look forward to a standardized test?) I took a personal day, drove to Philadelphia, and took the exam. I scored right around the middle of the bell curve, and I’m still waiting on the Analytical Writing score. I felt really good about the writing section, but only time will tell.

I had realized a few days before I took the test that I really had no idea as to what master’s program I wanted to enter, so I decided to hold off on applying anywhere for a while. I have some ideas now, but I don’t want to rush into anything and I do want to take a little bit of time to clear my head and plan carefully.

The following week was a short one for us JVs because we took off for Dalton, PA for Re-Orientation. It was only the second retreat where all of JVC East was present—the ninety of us won’t see each other again until Dis-Orientation in (gulp) August! We stayed in a seminary (although right now it functions as a retreat center because there aren’t enough vocations to fill the giant building) for the week, and I must say that I really appreciate the appeal of being a seminarian! I had my own little room with a desk and a rocking chair, which is really all I need. I never quite realize what the privacy of one’s own room feels like. The Fatima Center staff fed us very well, and (my favorite part) there was a Eucharistic chapel just down the hall from my room. If I had had the privilege of attending theology classes all day (I did, actually, but they weren’t necessarily comprehensive about our faith), it would have been a week in the life of a seminarian. Since I can’t do that, maybe I’ll go get a theology degree…

I think that our community as a whole found a lot of growth, both personal and communal, this past week. It wasn’t always pleasant, but it was a growing experience. After we had a talk at dinner on Monday, it felt like we’d knocked down a wall that had kept us from communicating fully. So I guess it was a big help. As it was, I called a few friends back home for support, all of which helped me somewhat.


On a semi-related note, our community was also in charge of planning Mass on retreat. Among other things, we planned the music—which is always my department. I must say, we have talented musicians in JVC East! Being the de facto director, I got a lot of compliments (which I tried hard to spread to the rest of the choir/band) on the music. People were pretty moved, and I was happy with it.

Now that I’m back at work, life didn’t wait for me to get back into the swing of things gradually. By 2pm on Tuesday (my first day back) I had to help break up a brawl in the lobby! Two women in their fifties were fighting over a boyfriend (I think—there was a lot of R-rated Spanish getting thrown around, but I caught most of what they were yelling at each other). The guards pulled off the aggressor, and I pulled away the one that was clearly losing the fight (she didn’t really fight me back, thankfully). Is it bad that I’m not shocked at any of this anymore?

So, now you’re caught up! Hopefully I won’t leave everyone hanging for a month again for a while.

Photos!

These are a bit overdue, but I only just found time to put them on the blog! These are pictures from my parents' visit and my going-away shindig.

Dagny and me

The troops from Bellingham!

The view from my front stoop.

Dad and me

Mom and me at the Liberty Bell

My parents and me in front of Independence Hall

Thankful

For a spirituality night this week, our exercise was to create a list of fifty things we are thankful for. Here's the one I came up with:

1. honey in my tea
2. homemade baked goods
3. a healthy, strong body
4. health insurance for when unexpected things happen to it
5. a community of amazing people to come home to every night
6. a big family back home
7. the best friends a girl could ask for cheering me on
8. parents who have always been committed to raising good people
9. two very different, but no less fantastic, siblings
10. the real presence in the eucharist
11. the holy rosary
12. spiritual reading a la Sheen and Merton
13. the collective works of Jane Austen
14. Jane Eyre
15. quirky reading, a la Christopher Moore and John Green
16. mozart
17. chopin
18. show tunes
19. pasta carbonara
20. growing our own parsley and basil in the backyard
21. homemade salad dressing
22. crockpot meals
23. la boheme
24. organic cotton yarn
25. foot rubs
26. hand lotion
27. herbal essences shampoo
28. yoga
29. new balance running shoes
30. sleepy monk organic coffee
31. ipod armbands
32. spanish rice
33. jewelry pliers
34. letters from home
35. care packages
36. emails/facebook messages from loved ones
37. patco subway rides to philly
38. jason robert brown musicals
39. josh groban
40. mocha breves
41. travel coffee mugs
42. breakfast for dinner
43. rowing machines
44. ferry rides
45. big hugs
46. cheek kisses
47. new stationary
48. the hallmark aisle of the supermarket
49. village thrift sweaters
50. suede high heels

You don’t have to live like a refuge… except on Mischief Night

Has anyone ever heard of Mischief Night?

Apparently on the night before Halloween, inner cities batten down the hatches for a night of vandalism, or worse, evidently in anticipation of Halloween night the following evening.

One of the maintenance workers in my office told me that “mischief night used to be fun. A little graffiti, a few eggs here and there, and we’d all go home, drink soda, and watch movies all night.”

He told me all this by way of lamenting what Mischief Night has become since then—houses and car get lit on fire, cars are destroyed when people bash in the windows, and passers-by get mugged or kidnapped.

The principal of the San Miguel school (where two of my roommates work) told his students at assembly that he did not want any of them to even leave their houses that evening because in the past, some students have not returned to school for several days following mischief night. When Mark asked one of his colleagues what happens on mischief night, the very well-mannered man answered, “They burn the f***ing city down.”

So, what does a group of white, new-to-the-inner-city volunteers do? Pack our bags and sleep somewhere else.

While I’m sure those who work with immigrants and refugees would object to my use of the term (which I use loosely), we were actually refugees for the night. We were displaced from our home because of a well-founded fear that we might come to harm if we remained there.

We went to the Philadelphia JV house, where we were warmly received by our friends with beds to sleep in and homemade Filipino food. Really, it was a pleasant gathering of friends, but for the fact that we couldn’t go home.

Ain't we cute?

This is us, the Camden JV's, at the Halloween party.

Dorothy, Glinda, and I left about twenty minutes later to get some SLEEP!

Cheerier things, as promised

OK, I can’t leave you all hanging with that last post. My life isn’t that dramatic all the time.

My birthday came the Sunday before last, so Saturday night my roommates threw a shindig at our humble abode. A few of the Philly volunteers came over with a cake and a card, and we hung out, played games, drank and talked.

This is how awesome the Philly JVs are: They got me a plastic ring with the Virgin Mary on it. The card read: “We know you really like Jesus, so we got you a ring with a picture of his mom on it.” :)

The next day there was an FJV party at the Philly JV house, so we went over there to help host. (The free food was a good incentive, too.) There was more cake, too! After some milling around, meeting and greeting, we took off for Mass at Old St. Joe’s, the oldest Jesuit parish in Philadelphia.

In case there was any doubt that I would have a blessed 23rd year, the priest at Mass quoted Lamb, one of my favorite books, in the homily. And there was Adoration with Taize for an hour after Mass. I didn’t know about it until the priest placed the host in the monstrance, but I had a rosary in my purse and decided to stay for a while. My friend Katie, a Philly JV, stayed with me. Further, they announced that this week, a relic of St. John Vianney will be at the parish for veneration from October 1st-7th. I’m headed there after work today to check it out.

When I got home, my roomies gave me their gift—a little chest of drawers with coupons in it. The coupons were for things like outings with each roommate (movie night with Mark, cooking with Christine, a trip to Walt Whitman’s grave (!) with Stephanie, a trip to the store for sweet things with Amber, and a walk to the waterfront with Jenna). JV community life is pretty sweet.

We went on retreat the following Thursday—the southern region of JVC east headed to Our Lady of Matapani (mad-uh-puh-NYE) in Maryland for a community-based retreat. In our completely unbiased opinion, we think we’re the best community. Hands down. :P

Matapani is a beautiful facility. The buildings were arranged in an oval, with a chapel at one end and a meeting hall on the other. There were cabins on either side. The buildings surrounded a big grassy area with a gazebo. Each cabin had a porch, where we spent a significant amount of time jamming with a guitar, a fiddle, a harmonica and a voice (they just can’t shut me up) improvising music. We got a football game going behind the cabins. There was personal, one-on-one time with each community member (we call these meetings “dyads”), big community meetings, Mass and a community mate game (much like the newlywed game). We won at the community part (we shall not speak of the bonus round, which 1) is the reason we lost and 2) had nothing to do with community. We’re not bitter or anything…)

Thrown into this whole weekend were the following factors: I woke up on my birthday with a cold, and consequently lost my voice for the entire duration of the retreat (excluding the porch jam session). Four out of six Camden JVs have succumbed to this illness in the last two weeks. Amber and I seem to be suffering from its lingering effects (sweet Amber has an ear infection. I just can’t stop coughing and have very low energy). We also pulled the mother of all pranks on the Philadelphia JVs (they had it coming—they started the war). It was quite the whirlwind of secrecy, guile, deception, and logistics to pull it off.

We came back to work on Monday, but Monday night I didn’t fall asleep until 6am because I kept coughing. (Before you ask, no, we did not have any cough syrup. No, I didn’t buy any when I got sick. But that’s only because I didn’t have a cough then.) So when I walked into work the following day, they sent me right back home because I looked terrible.

So I spent yesterday at home on the couch. I watched the best sick day movie in the world—Robin Hood: Men in Tights. I was there when TWO birthday packages came in the mail, so they cheered me right up. I slept like a baby, both during the day and last night. I still don’t feel 100%, but at least I can function.

Those were some happy days. I love the days following a birthday, when the surprises sort of trickle in. It shall be a good year.

I'm here: A Camden update

Hey, everyone!
As you may or may not have surmised from my long (or so it feels) absence from the Internet, I a) have been very busy since I left the Wednesday, and b) have been without Internet that entire time. Look for updates here and there, but don’t be surprised if it takes me a day of two to respond if you email or Facebook me; I’ll only have access to the web at work.

So, we (the Camden JVs) have arrived! The reception in the community so far has been very positive, and very overwhelming. Former Jesuit Volunteers (hereafter referred to as FJVs) came to visit us within hours of our arrival, most (thankfully) bearing food or beverages for us. I don’t think we’ve touched any of the food we picked up at the grocery store yet, and this is our fifth day here!

But before I get too far into our time in Camden, I should start with the journey out of Seattle to Baltimore.

"The moment or hour of leave-taking is one of the pleasantest times in human
experience, for it has in it a warm sadness without loss. People who don't
ordinarily like you very well are overcome with affection at leave-taking... It
would be good to live in a perpetual state of leave-taking, never to go nor to
stay, but to remain suspended in that golden emotion of love and longing; to be
missed without being gone; to be loved without satiety. How beautiful one is and
how desirable; for in a few moments one will have ceased to exist."
- from the book "Sea of Cortez" by John Steinbeck and E. F. Ricketts

My last few days out west were full of that “warm sadness without loss.” I hugged goodbye most of the people that I meant to see before taking off, especially at the lovely shindig my family threw for me before going. Thanks to all the Bellingham people who make the drive to Everett to see me off! Love you!

I visited some good friends before going, too. When I walked away from a few homes that held the people I love, it felt like my heart was ripping through the muscles of my back. But even in those moments, I feel absolutely certain that this (Camden, and more broadly, JVC) is exactly where I am supposed to be.

I flew out of Seattle around midnight on Wednesday night/ Thursday morning. Since it was a red-eye flight and I was flying toward the sunrise, I basically skipped Wednesday night. So it felt like Wednesday and Thursday were all one, long day. At the airport in Baltimore, I managed to grab a latte and some breakfast before taking a cat nap by the baggage claim. Eventually I found my community hanging out near where the bus was supposed to pick us up, and after the standard confusion of moving sixty people to one location on a bus, we got on a charter bus and drove to Blue Ridge Summit in Pennsylvania.

Blue Ridge is simply gorgeous. It’s owned by the Jesuits in the area, and frequently is used for retreats like the one we were on. We had a lot of talks, small groups and presentations on the core JVC values: community, spirituality, simple living, and social justice. We had Mass three times: once to kick off the retreat, one for the feast of the Assumption, and one we call the missioning liturgy, when we are all blessed and sent forth to our cities. At that Mass we each received our Jerusalem cross, which is a traditional symbol of missionaries. It’s one large cross, representing Jerusalem, and four little ones around it, representing the four corners of the earth. In JVC, the four crosses stand for the four values.

We got to Camden without incident and found our little house, which is downright luxurious by JVC standards. Carpeting, two stories plus a basement, laundry machines, a dishwasher, 2.5 baths, 4 bedrooms. The dining room table is a big, beautiful, sturdy thing that just screams for people to sit around it and be a community every night. We are VERY well taken care of around here.

The only drag, and certainly what will become the cross that I bear in terms of staying connected with my family and friends, is that we have very limited access to the Internet. I do have a computer at work, but I can't use Facebook or anything like that there. This is all part of learning to live simply, which is one of the main reasons I became a JV; I wanted to purify my faith and life by rooting it in the Gospel, and part of that is giving up worldly goods. Having such a great house makes that a little more difficult, but we're at least going to try going without internet. I don't know if it will last; we plan to revisit the issue in about a month and make a decision as a community. Until then, my apologies if I'm slow to get back to you!

We visited each other's placements the last two days (after a lovely tour d'Camden led by Nick, an FJV, and my amazing cousin), and I have to say that I think we were all placed really well. I like my supervisor, Irma. She's a cool lady, and I look forward to working with her.

Also (I don't have photos of it yet, but believe me), I got a pleasent surprise: I get my own office!!! I am officially a grown up, with a job and an office! Granted, my computer there leaves something to be desired, but I'll take what I can get.

Last night marked our first trip to Philadelphia, so we hopped a PATCO subway to the big(ger) city. We had a great time with some Philly FJVs at a bar called Noche, and then headed back to the Philly JV house. It was a good time. Those of us who headed back last night got caught in a truly diluvian rainstorm last night. I actually took out my contact lenses and carried them in my hand because the rain kept washing them out! Some of my clothes (the ones that can't be dried in the drier) are STILL not dry yet! It was quite the adventure.

I'll write more later about our neighborhood and work-- I start at my job on Monday.

If you want to reach me, PLEASE email me instead of using Facebook (call me for the address; I don't want to put in on a public blog.). It will be easier for me to respond to you. Or you can send me snail mail (like my lovely friend Sara did-- I got a letter this morning!)-- call, text, or email for the address. :)

Take care, everyone!

Molly

I've been tagged!

By Lauren. :)




8 Things I'm Looking Forward To:

1. Figuring out what I'm going to do with my life past September.
2. Spending the summer in B'ham hanging out, working out, and reading pretentious novels.
3. Dating someone new if/when I get to a new location. :P
4. Watching all the babies that my family and friends are having grow.
5. Seeing the Mariners have a winning season.
6. Getting a car.
7. Getting my own place.
8. Having a job to subsidize both.

8 Things I Did Yesterday:

1. Woke up early to cantor at Mass.
2. Had coffee and pastries with Marie and Claire.
3. Celebrated Andrew's birthday with brunch at Arlis's.
4. Took two naps.
5. Went to Mill Creek to celebrate my aunt's graduation from UW, and meet Baby Dagny!
6. Stopped on the side of the freeway to pickup my cousin Matt because his car broke down.
7. Began a knitting project while watching death note with Marc,
8. Watched the last 30 minutes of Once Upon a Time in Mexico with the troops at the Siena House before bed.

8 Things I Wish I Could Do:

1. Play piano and guitar.
2. Go to Rome for an extended period of time.
3. Sew my own clothes.
4. Have the resources to cook more often and get better at it.
5. Run a couple miles without it being a big deal for me.
6. Write a really awesome novel.
7. Find the person I'm supposed to marry and tell him I love him.

8 Shows I Watch: I don't really watch TV, but I have a few guilty pleasures. Don't judge!

1. Pushing Daisies
2. Scrubs
3. Friends
4. Law and Order
5. Death Note (Thanks, Marc...)
6. --
7. --
8. --

Now, I tag: Clair, Marc, and Patrick. :)

Peer Ministers of 2008-2009

We are officially in the middle of prep week at the Newman Center...

First, we PMs took off for Deming for a retreat, whereupon many inside jokes were conceived and born... they should be all grown up by June... (a few examples: a trio of otters, a number-German billboard hit song, written and sung by an eight-year-old called "Schni, schna, schappi... it means, "bite, bite, Bitey," trying to figure out how to be Vladimir Putin in a game of charades... you get the idea). It looks like a great team; we definitely found ourselves praying together a lot, hugging a lot, telling each other bedtime stories... I've included some pictures down below here.

Thus far this week we've been preparing for the coming year-- planning the liturgies, working on our usual beginning-of-the-year on-campus evangelization (root beer floats, anyone?). I've been planning music for the Masses (duh), have typed up a catalogue reference of the NCCM music library, and am currently trying to arrange some harmonies to our Mass parts (evidently, there were some before I ever got here, but no one wrote them down. I may make someone sing them into my voicemail so that I can just transcribe it. It'd be faster than looking everywhere). I can already tell where I am going to meet resistance this year, so I'm doing my best to stand firm in how I think this ought to be done. My role in the Mass is by no means pivotal, but that doesn't mean it isn't significant enough to do to the absolute best of my ability. But minor issues aside, it will be a great year.

Siena house

I'm here!

I'm all moved in!

I have a desk and a bed and a dresser! I'm set!

I live here!

Now that's what I call a BIG lapse of concentration

Has it really been so long since I last blogged? Huh.

The blog has fallen by the wayside, but oddly not because I'm any more busy than I ever was. Part of me claims a need for privacy-- many of the things in my life of late that I really want to write about have been of a pretty personal nature. And those things are, well, personal. They go in the real diary, not the online one. The people who need to know do know; the people who don't need to know may find out one day, but at least they won't have found out because I spilled my guts in cyberspace. Nothing huge, just things that I feel need to remain close to my heart.

Since the last post (June 18?!?) I have moved home for the summer, with intermittent trips back home to Bellingham. Most were to sing at Sacred Heart, a few were for rehearsals for wedding music, twice was for moving my things out of my wretched apartment (AND, let it be known, the lease EXPIRED today at 5pm! I'm free! And now I officially live at the Siena house), and once was just because I wanted to see everybody.

People have come and go quite a bit this summer: Cory and Athena, quite notably, took off for Arizona shortly after their wedding. And oh buddy, do I miss them. But remember, we all receive the Blessed Sacrament. And if Christ is present to me in the Sacrament, He sure as shooting is present to them in it, too. So really, how far apart are we? Lauren, Athena, Sara, Andrew, John, and Cory have all left 35th St, which means next year... well, they won't be there. But again, we'll never be very far apart. I've also seen some people that I've missed: Lauren came home for a baby shower, and I got to hang out with her and feel the baby kick; Jacob has returned from Alaska, and it's seriously like he never left, and I got to hang with Lindsey a bunch before her wedding.

This summer has entailed: two weddings (congratulations to the Gaunts and the St. Hilaires! I found myself wishing at Andrew and Lindsey's wedding that I had been born into the St. Hilaire family-- that would have been a great childhood! And Andrew would have been my brother!), four dead deer (I'm back at the county road crew, by the way), a lot of reading, a lot of flagging, knitting for imminent babies, driving around a lot and singing a lot.

This month ought to prove quite fun: we've already had the St. Hilaire wedding, next Thursday I head to Oregon with the family for a few days, then I'm hitting a ball game with Patrick the next weekend. Sprinkle the word "work" into that list a few times and you basically have the rest of my summer.

My last day of work shall be the 5th of September. Soon after I'm going back to Bellingham to go on a peer minister retreat to prepare for the coming year. So I think I'm going to hit the ground running, and may not stop until at least December. No matter. My extra-curricular life is composed of taking care of 1) the faith, 2) the friends, and 3) liturgical music. Life is pretty damn fine.

Holy crap, another engagement!

Congratulations, Lauren and John! If all goes well, there will be two NCCM-related weddings this summer! Let's hear it for this happy couple!

Work hard, play harder

But maybe not in that order.

Last night was the engagement celebration for the happy couple (read: alcohol flowed like a river because we were all so excited that we didn't think we were drunk. Hence, a margarita and two Irish car bombs... yikes). Good conversation, good laughs, good times.

But the good times waxed on until roughly 1:30am, and we had a fundraiser for Tijuana at 8 the next day (e.g. today). Oh, buddy. Patrick and Corina and Marc and I drove to the church, and Marc and I were a wee bit hungover and under-rested. REALLY oh, buddy- he and I had a jam-packed day today (breakfast from 8-2, retreat meeting 2-4, PM meeting (for him) 4-5:30, choir 5:30-6:30, Mass at 6:30.), and we both started it off in... less than ideal shape. We were both remarkable productive, considering that...

I think we made a killing at the breakfast (the good people of Sacred Heart tend to bank roll a lot of this trip for us), which was great. It got a little crazy because we forgot how temperamental the grill is and fell behind in the making of the pancakes (there was a huge line) because it was too hot to cook. I was in charge of the eggs (with a lot of help, obviously. When you need to crack 100 eggs, it's good to have a lot of people!) which went fine until I burned the skin off of my knuckle trying to stir bake them (my out fault. Note to self: wear oven mitts next time). No biggie, just wrap it and keep going (though Marc made me take a break).

Then, off to the retreat planning meeting, which went well. Many plans were made, especially Corina's awesome t-shirt design! We designed a pretty kick-ass skit, too (going to the doctor for a physical; get your heart, mind, soul, and strength checked out. It was funny...).

Then Mass itself, and finally home to do all the homework that I put off in order to work so much today and play so much yesterday!

Going to the chapel and we're gonna get married!

Athena and Cory are getting married!

I was actually in the room about an hour before he proposed (Athena got a call from her sister, and the first thing we heard her say was "No, I'm not engaged!" Cory had a major panic attack very quietly on the couch, but he did make a comment and then wink at me. I got all the way home before I figured it out!)

So there's a celebration tonight, and we're looking at a June wedding! Yay! I'm so happy for both of them. I love it when good things happen to good people.

Ooh, you make me live/ Whatever this world can give to me...

"Oh, you're the best friend that I ever had/ I've been with you such a long time/ You're my sunshine/ and I want you to know that my feelings are true/ I really love you (ooh)/ Oh, you're my best friend."

Unfortunately, right now you're all far away!

So I'm going to go hole up in a hole-in-the-wall bookstore with my laptop and just write for a while. Thinking of you, whoever you are (that is, you reading this).

If you get a minute today (or five minutes and fifty-six seconds, to be exact), listen to Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody." Today would have been Freddie Mercury's (the brilliant and incredibly flamboyant front man of the group) 61st birthday. Alas, he died of AIDS in 1991. The death of one of the most brilliant minds in pop music history (the man came up with Bohemian Rhapsody in his head- he was a genius) helped raise global awareness of the disease.

So as a nod to a pop music legend, or a nod to the ongoing battle against AIDS, or in the spirit of rock n' roll, crank up the stereo, bang your head, and belt it out!

"So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye?/ So you think you can love me and leave me to die?/ Oh baby - can't do this to me baby!/ Just gotta get out - just gotta get right outta here!"

110° In The Shade

Blimey, it's hot.

Although it isn't really 110° in the shade. That's the name of a musical that I learned a fun, "dramatic" song from.

I knew my blog was going to get boring once I started work- there's so little to write about! But I'll try. Thoughts in bullet points:

• Ichiro Susuki earned the MVP award at the All Star game yesterday. He was was the first player ever to hit an inside-the-park home run at an All Star game. Actually, it was his personal first, too. My mom made this very astute observation: Does anyone else think it's ironic that the Japanese sensation's MVP prize was a really crappy American-made truck?
• The last Harry Potter book is coming out soon! I'm rereading the sixth one, in order to refresh.
• My dad and his godson, John, are up at Mt. Baker this week, fishing. Tomorrow night my brother and sister and I are going to go up and join them. We used to go every summer, when I was little. Although back then I didn't actually fish when we were in the boat. Holding a living thing as it dangles by its mouth from a sharp object never appealed to me very much. I used to sit in the boat and read while 10 or so of my cousins and three of my uncles would fish around me. Methinks that tradition is going to continue. I always loved being out there with everybody, but I hate actually catching fish.
• Ditto for eating the fish we caught/will catch. Seafood doesn't sit well with me. I, sired by a Bostonian and fruit of a Seattlite's womb, cannot eat fish. Joe's always joked that I'm not really related to anyone in this family (his proof being my hair color); considering my reaction to seafood, I'm being to wonder about that...
• One of my daily joys this summer is following Tuan's blog- his time in India sounds amazing! Although it makes me question the content of my own blog (what did Tuan do today? He brought food to the needy in India and nurtured his spiritual life. What did I d0? I held a sign... I'm not changing the world much...)
• Speaking of folks from B'ham, I spent about half of last week up on Catholic Row with my lovely NCCM cohorts. Highlights included a barbecue, learning how to use a Nintendo system (picture Patrick asking in a slightly incredulous voice, "Molly, have you ever played a video game before?" "No." For a nanosecond, the room was perfectly silent...), Mass with Fr. Qui-Tac at the Newman center, and dinner afterwards at Boomer's. I was so happy to see everyone- it made my week, truly.

This incredibly random, nonlinear, and ill-structured blog is brought to you by hypoglycemia and stifling heat. Thank you very much. Goodnight.

Sweet bird/ Goodbye

I was perusing my parents' bookshelf the other day and found C.S. Lewis's A Grief Observed on it. I picked it up to read it.

I'm glad I found it. Part of me wishes that I'd found it sooner, being that we lost Kristin over a year ago. The more intelligent part of me knows that reading it any sooner than now (after much time to heal) would have been too soon. I wouldn't have been able to relate to everything the author describes.

Even so, finding and reading it made me think about her more yesterday and today, so I hopped in the car to go to her grove.

Kristin was cremated and her ashes were scattered, so she has no grave site. That made the first year pretty rough, not having a place to visit. But since they dedicated the grove at SU, she has a little corner of the campus dedicated to her; a bench, a stone with a poem, a much smaller stone with her name on it (Christmas Day, 1984-April 25th, 2006), a tree, and many smaller plants.

It's nice to have a place where you can lay flowers for her when you miss her.

Holler! They published it!

The Western Front published my "stop objectifying my peers" letter!

I didn't know it was out there until a friend of mine mentioned it on Facebook (how lame does that sound? He's far away, if that makes it less dorky). Anyhoo, click here if you want to see it. Huge props to Erin and Tuan- they led TOB this year. A lot of what went into the letter was inspired by what they taught us.

Yesterday was a little long. Up at five, out the door at six, role call at 6:30, on the job until 4:30 (we just couldn't stretch it to five, although I waited around for Joe's crew for a while longer), and babysitting from 5 until 11:30. Long day, but a good day.

I hadn't seen Scott and Jen's kids since Christmas (well, technically I saw them all last weekend at Mass, but you don't run around and play Peter Pan at Mass. At least, not at any that I've been to). They're getting really big! Bryan's going to be really tall, and Emilie is surprising me- she has shot up, too. I thik they're both taking after Scott, who's a pretty tall guy. Kayleigh (whose looks exactly like her mother, and therefore will probably be quite petite) is two. She was born right after I graduated from high school, and consequently I don't know her as well as Bryan and Emilie (I've known them for 8 and 6 years, respectively).

BUT, when, I walked in yesterday, Kayleigh ran forward, wrapped her arms around my legs and yelled, "Molly!" Emilie was hiding around the corner, giggling. Methinks they worked on that one, since the last time I saw them, Kayleigh didn't know my name.

We played Marco Polo, Peter Pan, and watched Finding Nemo (not necessarily in that order). Oh, to be six years old again.