Classy lady

I was having one of those way-past-midnight talks with a friend of mine last night/this morning and we started talking about femininity. It came up that I come off to most people I come off as really, really feminine.

I asked him about that. I am not a ditz, I'm not giggly, I don't dumb down around boys to make them like me or inflate their egos, I don't even dress in a terribly girly manner. I am, however, really maternal, relatively emotional, a really good listener (a lot of people come running to me for help/emotional support, which I'm always quite happy to provide). Anyway, long story short, I was always confused about being labeled "girly" or really feminine because I somehow grew up with the impression that being girly means being a ditz or acting a certain way around men, a way that I have always refused to behave, or playing the "helpless little girl" role. Oh, please. Gag me. (An aside- it REALLY bothers me when otherwise intelligent, creative, and strong women play dumb to get people's attention. It bugs me more that it works. It bugs me still more when people get pissed off when someone won't act that way. I could name names, but I won't...)

Anyway, it seems to be a consensus among most people that I know, so I asked him about it. He thought for a second and then said, "You're not ditzy-girly, you're classy-girly." Yay! I'm classy!

The conversation then veered into how classy women are oddly received in this day and age (third-wave feminism still meets a lot of opposition- God forbid a woman act like a woman and still be considered strong and smart), especially given what a lot of girls are bred to believe are their role models- read Britney Spears, Lindsey Lohan, Paris Hilton, and the media's morbid fascination with how dumb they are. But they still have nice shoes and a ton of money, so they deserve our attention. Where are the classy, smart women? I ask you! At least in the 1990's we had Alanis Morrisette and Jewel- not to everyone's taste, but damn it all if they compromised anything in order to sell themselves! They were and are (well, Jewel sort of sold out after the makeover... but she's still smart and unique) authentic and intelligent women.